With the advance of education

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如下为同学雅思原文:

With the advance of education, people diverge on the purpose of education with one view claiming that education should be the incubator of people useful for the society whereas the other one asserting that education should be a method for people to pursue their own faith. I will discuss the rationality of both views in the essay.

The view empathizing on the utilitarian function of education deserves its justification. It is conventionally recognized that the comprehensive strength and sustainable development of a country associated extricably with its educational. For instance, students whom are imparted to the knowledge of science might reciprocate the society with the cutting-edge technology in the fields of military and astronomy, attributing to the prestige of the country. Additionally, received education of chemistry, learners might come up with sustainable and pollution-free energy which leads to the continued development of industry without the fear for the depletion of non-renewable energy such as oil and fuel.

However, the opinion based on individual development also has its rationality. It is blatantly implausible to force people to learn something they abhorring even the subject benefits the society, otherwise, people might find the learning process suffocating. For example, if students who actually were into arts had to study science just because of its pragmatic uses in improving technology, they might be hardly to feel emotional well-being while studying.

To conclude, both sides of views are understandable, whether talking about the purpose of education from the aspect from society or individuals. From my perspective, these views are not necessarily antagonistic with each other. People could pursue their life values while at the same time contribute to the society by deploying the knowledge they gained through education. 

如下为外教修改后的作文：